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Saturday 1 April 2006

MTV Fantasy Awards News

Sponsorships/Category Changes

The administrators of the MTV Fantasy Awards have announced the following changes to categories and the addition of sponsorships for the 2006 awards (for material published in 2005):

NASCAR 500 SERIES — Best Novel Award
TIDY BOWL — Best Novella Award
VIAGRA — Best Anthology Award
BUD LITE — Best Collection Award
BOB ROSS MEMORIAL — Best Artist Award
THE CHICKEN RANCH — Special Award: Super Professional
ENRON BANKRUPTCY COMMISSION — Special Award: Moderately professional
COCA COLA — Best Positive Use of a Cola Product Award

The short story category will be reinstated as soon as a sponsor can be found.

Location Change for Judges

In related news, the administrators announced that the new corporate sponsorships have allowed the MTV Fantasy Awards to shoulder the expense of having the judging panel for this year's award moved to a Malibu beach house. The five judges — Steve Lockley, Barbara Roden, Victoria Strauss, Jeff VanderMeer, and Andrew Wheeler — who have been sequestered at a converted crack house in Detroit since January, were not as thrilled about the change as might have been expected.

"Who cares where we live?" Roden said in an interview with Entertainment Weekly. "If Strauss steals my copy of Hot Firemen and the Edifices that House Them one more time, I'm leaving regardless."

"I understand we're living in a bad part of Detroit right now," Strauss said in the same article, "but a Glock, an M-16, and a double-barreled shotgun is too much firepower for any impaneled awards jury. But just try telling that to Lockley." (Lockley could not be reached for comment.)

Wheeler, also editor of the SF Book Club, seemed particularly unhappy with the sequestering arrangement.

"VanderMeer swears loudly in his sleep," Wheeler said when contacted by Locus Online reporters. "Strauss snores like a foghorn. And Roden sleepwalks into the kitchen and makes a huge mess of spaghetti and waffles that I have to clean up. I don't think it matters where we live. I'm still going to be working on four hours sleep. I pity the book that hits me at nine in the morning."

Wheeler added, "I don't mind Lockley, but I wish he'd stop leaping out from behind shrubbery and saying, 'Terrorist attack! Are you prepared?!'"

MTV has been shooting footage of the judges' many arguments and altercations for an as-yet-untitled reality series to air in the fall.


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